Calling myself ‘Baldacious’ for the first time in my life, was not less than a victory. I had been thinking of going bald since a long time and, the day had come when I went through extreme “hair existential crisis” questioning the purpose of hair on my head (Lol). The rough tiring mornings on my Laptop, the nervousness of completing college assignments before deadline acted as catalysts to want me to go bald.
One fine Saturday morning, I decided to (let go of my hair :p) get it S.H.A.V.E.D.
It was a huge shock for a not-so-progressive society to see that a girl got her head shaved and, still roaming around, BALDACIOUSLY. It reminds me of those wedding functions and parties where girls are expected to flaunt their beauty and curves with makeup, hairstyle and costly dresses. As we enter the event, people scan us from top to bottom to judge our “Looks” and shower us with compliments for looking “beautiful”. I always wonder if it is really “beautiful”, as paying the parlor does not pay off really well. At the end of the day, we get the appreciation, better say validation which girls are expected to get from the society.
It had been a long time desire to roam around like a Proud Baldie. Last year, I got a short haircut but later I realized that even short hair is tough to manage, particularly when I have other important things to do in life. Like planning a social intervention, thinking of a good research objective, going for field visits to villages, studying, reading, exercising and playing basketball. I wanted to do this for many years but the fear ‘what would people say’ demotivated me.
All the times I asked my mother if I could go bald, she would laugh at me thinking that I am joking. I always took the back seat, deciding not to hurt her. But this time, it was a moment of epiphany. I knew that I would convince her anyhow and, I decided to let myself loose. This time I gave space to my thoughts to act freely and loudly. I was so confident that after getting my head shaved at a men’s parlor, we had a video call:
Me(excitedly), “I have tried something amazing, Mom. Seeeee!”.
Mom(With a confused look) “Good, Now you have done it, what more to say”.
Me(as if I know nothing :p), “Mummy, What happened? Aren’t you happy?”.
Mom(as if trying to digest my bald look), “What should I say? Why would I have a problem?”.
Me(with a big smile and positive attitude), “Mummy, I am looking superbly beautiful. In the video call, it’s not clear. Otherwise, I am looking like the beauty of this world”.
My Parents started laughing like crazy and conversations took a hilarious turn.
Me(trying another reason)“You know mummy, When you did my mundan (ceremony of removing child’s hair after six months of being born), everyone enjoyed it but I couldn’t because I was very young and, I don’t remember. I always wanted to enjoy too, so I got my mundan done again”.
My parents went crazy laughing and, with a few more tits and bits, we started our daily conversation. Now, when I receive inspiring messages from women around me, my parents feel proud. My mother tells me that now she realizes that it takes guts for women to go bald and still walk gracefully, and she is proud to see her daughter taking those graceful steps.
P.S.: All pictures are personal.
Also, In Part 2 of ‘Me being Proud Baldie’, I will share how people reacted to this personal decision. And, how it is more of a rebel against regressive society than just a daily change in look. Stay tuned.